Woman at Point Zero

Woman at Point Zero, also titled Firdaus, is a 1975 novella by Nawal El Saadawi based on the true account of a woman named Firdaus who was convicted of murder and sentenced to death in 1974. Saadawi was a prolific Egyptian feminist and physician, and she worked with Egyptian women who experienced various mental conditions that Saadawi saw largely as resulting from living in a patriarchal society. She had the privilege of meeting Firdaus on her final day before execution and hearing her story firsthand. Firdaus’s story embodies feminist resilience and agency—and points to the subjectiveness of guilt and innocence. Woman at Point Zero thus remains an essential piece of international feminist literature.

This guide references the 2005 Cox & Wyman Ltd. version of the novella.

Content Warning: The novella and this guide include descriptions of child sexual abuse, sexual assault and rape, physical violence, and domestic abuse.

Plot Summary

In the Preface, Saadawi explains what led to her meeting Firdaus. While working as a psychiatrist in the 1970s and studying women with various mental health conditions, Saadawi became particularly interested in women in prison, and when she heard about Firdaus and her refusal to ask for pardon, Saadawi resolved to meet her. The author feels privileged that she not only met Firdaus on her last day of life but learned about Firdaus’s life story, which Saadawi was moved to share with the world. Her attempts to meet Firdaus are initially unsuccessful: Firdaus seems unwilling to see anyone and uninterested in the world around her. A female warder warns Saadawi that Firdaus doesn’t have time for her; the warder believes that Saadawi is part of the problem and insists that Firdaus is innocent. When Firdaus finally agrees to see her, Saadawi goes from feeling like an insignificant and utter failure to feeling like the whole world is within her grasp. She enters the prison, sees before her a proud, self-assured woman, and sits down on the cold floor, entering what she describes as a dreamlike state as Firdaus relates the events of her life in a voice that pierces like a blade.

Firdaus tells her life story chronologically. Her family is severely disadvantaged, and her many brothers and sisters die, leaving her alone with her parents. She sees her father in the crowd of men at Friday mosque and is unable to recognize him among the others. Men with aggressive desires eye her as she carries water above her head. In addition, young Firdaus is severely punished (through beating and genital mutilation) for questioning her father’s relation to her because she often feels that she doesn’t belong in her family. When she’s small, her mother protects and loves her, and her mother’s gaze totally embraces her. Over time, however, her mother becomes cold, as if life has been drained from her. One of Firdaus’s only fond childhood memories involves physical love with a boy she worked with in the fields. This pleasure is soon ruined when her uncle begins molesting her; but despite the abuse, she depends on him: He’s the only one willing to help her gain an education—and the only one who gives her any attention. After her parents die, Firdaus moves with him to Cairo, attending primary and secondary school. Upon finishing primary school, she sees a movie that features a sexual relationship and no longer feels comfortable around her uncle. He, in turn, withdraws from her and marries a “lazy,” hateful woman who insists on sending her to boarding school. In secondary school, she’s further alienated from her family and spends many hours in the library reading about the history of patriarchy. One night, she’s out reflecting on her life, and a teacher named Miss Iqbal approaches and stares at her with a gaze like her mother’s. Firdaus instantly feels a desperate love for the woman and begins to cry; soon Miss Iqbal is crying too. They hold hands, looking at one another in silent understanding. For weeks, Firdaus thinks of nothing but Miss Iqbal, and at graduation, Miss Iqbal helps her to the stage. Firdaus later feels forgotten and rejected by Miss Iqbal and leaves secondary school with a sense of emptiness.

She moves back in with her uncle and his family. The home is small, and she must sleep on a couch next to her uncle’s bedroom. One night, she overhears him and his wife discussing Firdaus’s future and whether she’ll be able to find work and move out. Her uncle’s wife suggests sending her to university, but he quickly dismisses the idea, stating that university isn’t for women. They next discuss marrying her off to a relative of her aunt-in-law—Sheikh Mahmoud—who recently retired and is almost 50 years her elder, so Firdaus runs away, but, accosted by aggressive eyes on the streets, rushes back to her uncle’s house. Soon, she’s married to Sheikh Mahmoud and for several weeks tolerates his sexual advances and the festering wound on his face. When he starts hitting her and one day violently beats her, she seeks shelter with her uncle, but his wife tells her that wives must obey their husbands and that religious law permits men to beat their wives. Back on the streets again, Firdaus meets a cafe owner named Bayoumi, who seems kind at first. However, he soon starts beating her, locks her in his house, and frequently rapes her. A neighbor rescues her, and she returns to the street, feeling empty and used. She wanders to a new part of Cairo where the air and the streets seem cleaner. While she’s resting by the Nile, a woman named Sharifa Salah el Dine approaches and sympathizes with her, recognizing that her predicament is the result of men’s abuse. She takes Firdaus home and gives her new clothes and a bath. Firdaus quickly becomes a sex worker for Sharifa (feeling nothing during her encounters), and when one customer reveals this truth to Firdaus, she leaves. On the street, she feels unafraid for the first time. She begins accepting money for sex and has a new sense of pride, realizing that money completely changes how others see and treat her. She gains new confidence and dignity, knowing she has power over the men who for so long dominated her. She can choose her customers and charge what she wishes.

By age 25, she has an apartment, a servant, and a secretary. She’s selective about clients and enjoys having control over her life. However, when a client remarks that her work is unrespectable, she feels shame and seeks what society considers a proper job. For three years, she works in an office, earning far less money and autonomy but experiencing many of the same problems. Men demand sexual favors in exchange for raises, and she realizes that women must always “sell” themselves somehow—but at least sex workers have control. She falls in love with a man named Ibrahim, who—just like Miss Iqbal—quickly rejects and forgets her; though devastated, she finds her strength and leaves her job to return to sex work. She feels that it’s the only way to live truthfully since all relationships with men involve sexual transactions, but only sex workers acknowledge this openly. Letting go of all desires, fears, and hopes, she feels free.

Years later, Firdaus is still enjoying her agency when a pimp begins following her. One day, he barges into her home, wielding a knife, and demands that she become his worker. She has no choice but to agree, and he takes most of her earnings, leaving her in the subjugated state she started out in. She tries to escape and, when he refuses to let her leave, stabs him several times, killing him. She walks out into the street completely unafraid after seeing fear in a man’s eyes for the first time. When an Arab prince stops her to request her services, she declines until he agrees to 3,000 pounds. After the encounter, he pays her, but she becomes irate and tears up the money, which represents every sexual transaction throughout her life. She tells him that she was taught to kill and has killed before—and then slaps him. After he panics and screams, the police arrive and arrest her. She confesses to murdering the pimp and refuses to ask for pardon, instead readily and fearlessly awaiting her execution. Firdaus’s story concludes on her last day of life, with Saadawi watching as she’s taken away to be killed. Saadawi’s concluding thoughts reflect on the contradiction between the truth and the consequences that Firdaus endured, believing her both innocent and courageous in a world that aimed to hold her down.